stormchaser78

08:37 pm: Wisdom from kids
You just never know what kids are going to say.  Especially mine.  She has this quirky sense of humor that only ever really shines every once in a while.  The other day was one of those times.

It had been another frustrating day at work.  I'd had to do yet another late-night admission (even though I wasn't on call), which brought my overtime total to something like 15 hours for the week.  To make matters worse, my parents were in town, and were waiting on me to go eat dinner so that my dad could go on to a class reunion.  I didn't get there until well after 8pm, effectively making my dad miss all of the activities for that night.  And let's not forget that since the kiddo is 11, she is hungry CONSTANTLY, which means she was starving by the time I got done.  A perfect recipe for frustration that reaches the boiling point quickly.

We got our food and sat down, and I began to vent some of my frustrations to my parents.  Since my dad is also in the medical field, he understands a lot of what I go through, so he makes a pretty good sounding board.  I was just winding up my rant, and said, "I just need to learn to say NO!" 

At that point the kiddo, around a mouthful of coleslaw, made a seemingly incongruent statement: "Just pretend like they are asking you to buy a snake."

I was completely confused, and not at all certain she had been following the conversation, so I said, "Huh?"  She repeated, "Pretend they are asking you to buy a snake."  Still trying to figure what a snake has to do with my job, I said, "A snake?  What in the world are you talking about?" She then looked at me and said, "Mom, can I buy a snake?"

If she knows nothing else about me, she knows how I feel about snakes.  "NO, you can't buy a snake!"

She said, "See?  Just like that!  Good practice."  And went back to eating her coleslaw.

We grown-ups make things so hard.  It took me about five seconds to figure it out, but once I did, I couldn't stop laughing.  Leave it to an 11-year-old to point out the obvious.

10:47 pm: Returned from globetrotting.
I was right...it was SO worth it.  Aside from crossing a thing or two off the old "List of Things to Do Before I Die", I met a lot of really cool people, and learned a lot of things that the history/social studies books don't tell you.  Amazing.  I'll post pictures when I can.

04:46 am: Going globetrotting
Yeah, so I'm going far, far away in the morning.  Really, in a couple of hours.  I still have SO much to do, but until I either get sunlight, banking hours, or the laundry buzzer, I've done all I can for the moment.  Dang, I'm tired...but it's gonna be SO worth it.

Hasta la bye-bye!

09:49 pm: Work rant.
In a floundering economy, I am singularly blessed to have a profession that translates into work whenever, wherever, and however I want it.  It was that thought process that got me into this field, actually - economies come and economies go, but there will ALWAYS be sick people, and there are way more sick people than there are nurses to care for them.  So why on earth do employers treat their nurses like they are disposable?

Take for example last week.  After weeks of telling my boss that I'm behind and am having a hard time catching up due to high patient load, and after having complained before that for this being a "flexible" job I've had to make an awful lot of other arrangements to have my child picked up from school, I get told that my case load is "not unreasonable", I am "NOT overworked", and that I am expected to be "available" to my patients from 8 to 5 and that if I find that a problem, I might need to find other employment. 

On the surface, that sounds reasonable.  However, what that DOESN'T tell you is that by "available", they mean that if a patient that is 60 miles away calls needing something at 4:30, I am expected to go see to it.  What that translates out to is a bare minimum of an hour on the road (barring any traffic at all), a bare minimum of 30 minutes fixing whatever it was that was the problem (usually it's more like an hour or an hour and a half), and then another hour back.  More than once, that has meant that I haven't gotten home from my "8 to 5 availability" until well after 8pm.  What that also means is that my 11-year-old child gets to be schlepped all over creation, and then gets to sit in the car while I deal with whatever, because once I'm finally able to get her from school (usually 30 minutes or more late), she doesn't have anywhere else to go where she has adequate (or any) supervision.  Curiouser and curiouser, we do employ full-time on-call staff, who work from 5pm to 8am, and do nothing except take call.  Remind me again why the case managers have to see to these things?

So when I again complain to my bosses about just this situation, their solution to my problem is to put them on the "pick-up" list at school so they can come get her.  If there's anyone out there who thinks that asking your boss to pick up your child from school on ANY kind of basis, much less a regular one, is A-OK, then I'd like to hear about it.  Not to mention that I have no desire for my child to sit at my bosses' house until Dark-Thirty while I'm running around like a headless chicken.

Even better, they proceed to tell me that if I'm having "personal problems", then they need to know about them so that they can "take those into consideration".  Once again, since when is it appropriate to air your dirty laundry to your boss?  Please don't misunderstand, I think my bosses are good people, and were I to tell either of them about my problems as a friend, they would probably have a lot of empathy and perhaps even good advice.  But as this is an employer/employee relationship, that's SO not gonna happen.  All I need is for my performance review to come up and it to say, "Allows personal problems to interfere with work performance".  Not to mention that with that fodder in their cannon, they have free rein to brush off any legitimate job concern I have as something that is due to my "personal" stress.

The real kicker is...I've talked to my co-workers.  (Why is it that bosses always think employees don't talk amongst themselves?  I've never figured that out.)  And come to find out, most of us have been pulled into the principal's office and each been compared to the rest...unfavorably.  I won't bore you with the details, but suffice it to say that we are all basically being told that each is the outlier, and not in a good way.  Good for morale and team cohesiveness, no?  Oh, but I forgot...we don't talk, so it must not matter.

The one thing we are all being told that IS the same, is that our case load is "not unreasonable".  Bear in mind that there are six full-time case managers in the field, and our patient total has stayed at or above 85 for the last 6 months, and has been as high as 98 or 100.  Also bear in mind that out of the six case managers, four of us have been there less than a year.  (Does that mean I have seniority???)   If you do the math, that translates out to about 14 to 16 patients apiece.  Considering the fact that the majority of us were told when we were hired that they wanted our maximum (let me repeat - MAXIMUM) caseload to be 12, that seems a bit excessive.  When I brought that up with the bosses, I was told that that was the "old" care model, and that the "new" care model says 13 to 15 patients is the expectation.  Naturally, the quality (and quantity) of care is not given an equal ratio for decrease.  So basically, we are expected to provide the same level of excellence, to anywhere from 1 to 3 extra patients and their families as well as the 12 we already had, in the same 40-hour work week, all with absolutely NO compensation for the extra.  Now, define "unreasonable" for me again?

The thing is, I've been with this company when it WAS a good place to work.  I KNOW that it can be a good, enjoyable job.  But while change isn't always bad, new ownership seems to have no idea that what they expect of us and what can actually be accomplished are not even in the same ballpark, at least not if they are interested in keeping nurses longer than a year.  By the end of Wed night (I got home at 9pm that night), I had 16 patients.  Before I even started work Friday, I had already hit 40 hours.  And the people that really pay for this are the patients.  I've never believed in what I call "drive-by nursing", where you basically just throw some pills at your patients from the driveway and then cruise on down the road.  I believe they deserve more than that from us, especially at the end of life.  But to stay within that 40-hour parameter, it is becoming necessary.  I hate that more than anything else, and I'll work as much overtime as I need to in order to save any of my patients from feeling as though their needs are not worth my limited time.  Until I hit burnout.  At which point, perhaps I'll take my bosses' ever-so-helpful advice and find other employment.  Overtime is expensive, but so is training, and nurses are a rare breed (especially good ones).  I'm just wondering how many times it'll take for them to get hit in the pocketbook before they figure this deal out.

06:46 pm: Lion vs mouse
In my daily commute the other day, a thought occurred to me.  Probably to someone else, it would neither be significant nor profound.  But it got my attention.  The thought was, what in my life could I or should I have done differently?  That train of thought, when used to avoid going forward, is a hindrance and a crutch.  However, when used to steer your life in a direction more consistent with the person you want to be, it can be a useful tool.

As I was thinking about that, I didn't really have any specific decisions in my life on my mind.  Sure, I have made decisions that I'm not as satisfied with as I'd like to be, but that wasn't what was on my mind.  What got my gears turning was a song I heard on the radio called "The Voice of Truth".  I was kind of listening with half an ear, hearing the part of the song singing about David and Goliath.  It's a story I have heard countless times throughout my life.  It's really a good story, always a favorite of kids, well loved by adults, but I had never really given it too much thought.  But for some reason, as I listened to the song, it dawned on me just how much courage and faith it took for David to face a grown man, literally three times his size, whose sole intention was to not only kill him, but to make him look like a total idiot in the process.  For the first time in a long time, I took a new look at the old story.

I guess in theory, I've always known that David didn't know what the outcome of that fight was going to be.  All he knew is that someone was insulting his God, his country, his way of life and everything he held dear, and he knew that he could not in good conscience let it go unchallenged.  But in having known the ending of the story for as long as I can remember, it never really sank in that David didn't.  He acted on faith in his God and courage bigger than every other man in his nation, not knowing if he would win, not knowing if he would be killed, only knowing that WOW, that's a big dude.  Even his own countrymen had odds placed against him.  The end result of that courage?  An entire nation of people to this day either pride themselves on being of his lineage, or wish they were.

As that all sunk in, it made me think...what chances at greatness have I passed up simply because I didn't have the courage to go for it?  I have no desire to achieve the kind of greatness that David did.  The funny thing is, I don't think David did either.  He just saw what needed to be done, and did it.  But even if not aspiring for greatness, the chance to accomplish great things in life is often presented as a challenge that takes courage.  The key is to recognize it for what it is, and then have the guts to go for it.  It really does make me wonder just how many of those opportunities have passed me by, in my fear and complacency.  But challenges come in just as many forms as fears, as great and as small, and I hope that the next time I'm faced with one, I have both the wisdom to see it for what it is, and the courage to rise to meet it.

03:29 pm: A feeling to which words just don't do justice.
"I want to be with you."

Those are the sweetest words I could ever have hoped to hear.

11:05 pm: Moving day!
WOOHOO!!!  Moving day is finally here!  So hasta la pasta until I get my new internet set up!  Wish me luck!

12:33 pm: Wow!  So a whole lot of soul-searching, elbow grease, job change, and just good old stubbornness later, my life is pretty good!  For the first time in almost 2 years, I'm actually starting to feel like I belong here.  It took a lot of work, patience, tears, understanding, and courage to get here, but the view is certainly much nicer.  I think I'll stay for a while.

So for those of you who knew just how much my last job was stressing me out, you'll be happy to know that not only have I changed jobs, but changed fields entirely.  I looked into a lot of different nursing options, and I decided to go with home health.  It's TOTALLY different from hospital nursing, and parts of it are taking a little time to wrap my mind around, but for the most part, I love it.  I love the hours (daytime - yay!), I love the flexibility, I LOVE being home with my family every night.  Oddly enough, the pay is also better.  The really strange thing is, my workweek went from 36 hours in 3 days to 40 hours in five, yet I seem to have a lot more time to do the things I want to do.  Not quite sure how that works out, but it does.  Maybe I'm just less tired. :)  I'm certainly less stressed!

The family is doing great, too.  STBF has been doing a lot of leatherwork (which he loves), and we've done a lot more SCA stuff lately.  We've gotten a period tent (medieval-looking for the non-SCA folks), and much to my surprise, I've really liked it.  Princess has been learning to be more responsible for herself, and has been taking on more chores.  She drags her heels on a lot of them, but she does get them done!  We had thanksgiving dinner with a bunch of other friends who didn't have family nearby, which was great fun.  So for each of us individually, and for all of us as a family, things are rosy.

So there's a brief update for those of you who've emailed me asking when in the world I was going to give one. :)  Hope everything is just as peachy for each of you!

12:25 am: Complicated questions.
How do you retrace your steps when you aren't sure how you got where you are?

How do you break it back down to basics in a long-term relationship?  Or can it even be done?

Where do you start when trying to build communication where it doesn't currently exist?

I feel like a blind man who's been asked to draw an elephant.

04:55 pm: Father's Day
To all the dads, stepdads, granddads, dads-to-be, and father figures out there...a heart-felt Happy Father's Day.  You guys are amazing, and you are more important than you know to the lives of the children (and grown children!) that you touch.

09:32 pm: A mother's day moment
For those of you that didn't receive this email from me, it was funny enough that I thought I would post it on my blog.  (Also, if you didn't get this email from me, check with me and make sure I HAVE your email...I've had lots bounce lately.)  Happy Mother's Day!

"So, we had this great 10 year old cat named Jack who just recently 
died. Jack was a great cat and the kids would carry him around and sit on 
him and nothing ever bothered him. He used to hang out and nap all day 
long on this mat in our bathroom. Well we have 3 kids the middle one is Eli.
 
Eli really loves chapstick.  LOVES it. He kept asking to use my 
chapstick and then losing it. So finally one day I showed him where in the 
bathroom I keep my chapstick and how he could use it whenever he wanted to; but 
he needed to put it right back in the drawer when he was done.

Last year on Mother's Day, we were having the typical rush around and
try to get ready for Church with everyone crying and carrying on. My 
two boys are fighting over the toy in the cereal box. I am trying to nurse 
my little one at the same time I am putting on my make-up. Everything is 
a mess and everyone has long forgotten that this is a wonderful day to 
honor me and the amazing job that is motherhood. We finally have the older 
one and the baby loaded in the car and I am looking for Eli. I have 
searched everywhere and I finally round the corner to go into the bathroom.  
And there was Eli. He was applying my chapstick very carefully to Jack's
rear end. Eli looked right into my eyes and said "chapped."  Now if 
you have a cat, you know that he is right--their little butts do look 
pretty chapped.  And, frankly, Jack didn't seem to mind. And the only 
question to really ask at that point was whether it was the FIRST time Eli had 
done that to the cat's behind or the hundredth. 

And THAT is my favorite Mother's Day moment ever because it reminds us
that no matter how hard we try to civilize these glorious little
creatures, there will always be that day when you realize they've been
using your chapstick on the cat's butt."

07:56 pm: It's JAIL, people.
May I just say this?  Jail is SUPPOSED to suck!

I'm not really sure when our country got all backwards and decided that convicted criminals should live better than the folks they victimize.  But it seems the mentality now is one of misguided 'compassion'.  People are more concerned with "criminal rights" than with making sure the people whose lives they've torn apart are able to recover in any way.  Jails have cable?  I don't even have cable!  Criminals have access to education?  That's more than they can say for thousands of Americans who HAVEN'T broken the law!  So what does this tell me?  Let's go break some laws!  Life will be SWEET then!  Not only would I NOT have to do laundry, cook dinner, clean house, pay bills, or go to work, but I would get to watch better TV while taking a break from the scholastics that the taxpayers are paying out the nose for!  And state-of-the-art workout equipment to boot!  WOOT!  Jail is sounding better than my last vacation.

Whatever happened to consequences for actions?  Whatever happened to accountability?  It's no wonder crime is on the rise...the things that happen to you should you happen to get caught committing any crimes aren't all that bad!  If jail actually sucked, like it was intended to, maybe people would be a little more hesitant to do things that might put them there!

A while back there was a big uproar about the sheriff in Arizona who makes his inmates wear pink and live in tents.  "It's inhumane," some of the inmates have whined.  Um, no.  Let me tell you what's inhumane...what's inhumane is the crimes that some of them have committed against their fellow man.  What's inhumane is what the victims and their families have to go through during the crime itself and then while attempting to put their lives back together.  So you live in a tent.  So you have to wear pink underwear.  So you got your "adult" magazines taken away.  See me crying a river?  Yeah, me neither.  Because I personally think this guy is onto something.  See, that is the kind of jail that DOES suck, the kind that make criminals say, "Gee, that really sucked...I sure don't want to go back there.  Perhaps I shouldn't do the kinds of things that would make that happen again!"

This is a slightly different issue, but I think it makes the point for the mentality to which I've been referring.  In regards to the recent shooting at Virginia Tech, I saw some woman comment that that man was mentally ill and "deserves our compassion."  Since when does being mentally ill render a person automatically and immediately deserving of my compassion?  I know many people who struggle with mental illness.  None of them that I am aware of has gone out and killed 32 people, and injuring several more, while sending twisted and sick self-videos to news stations in between bloodbaths.  My compassion is reserved for the families of his victims, and for his own family that he has by default victimized.  For him, not so much.  I don't hate him, but I do hold him solely and squarely responsible and accountable for his actions that day.  What he took, he can never give back.  His actions were permanent.  He knew exactly what he was doing.  Because of that, my compassion rests elsewhere.

What really gets me is that had he lived, he would have gone to trial, would have PERHAPS been convicted of capital murder, and then either would have spent the rest of his life in comfort - oops, I mean jail - or would have spent years and years in comfort - oops, I mean on death row - before he was finally executed in as humane a manner as possible, with attorneys and activists and what have you fighting for him to the bitter end.  Where were all the attorneys and activists for the rights of those students and teachers while they were being brutally murdered?  They were ducking and covering like the rest of everyone else facing a cold-blooded killer!  It's easy to scream about having compassion for him when you AREN'T staring down the business end of his gun.  I'm sure they would have screamed that he "deserves" not to go to jail for his actions, either.  Not that it would have mattered if he had, because like I say, jail doesn't suck anyway.

Apparently, not only is "De Nile" not just a river in Egypt, but it's also flowing clean through modern America as well.  I guess we'll see how many more people have to drown in it before they figure it out.  Until then, perhaps I'll move to Arizona.

07:10 pm: FINALLY!
Oh, the day I've been waiting for for what seems like forever!  I have been trying to pay off my credit cards for YEARS, and have never gotten it down to more than half-way there.  But thanks to my tax return (and NOT having to spend it for emergencies/keeping things afloat for a change), I was FINALLY able to pay ALL of them off!  WOOHOO!!  Yeah, I'm excited.  And of course I had to pass it along.

In other news, I'm finally starting to dance again.  I went through a good long spell where I really just didn't feel like it, and since belly dance is a heart-and-soul kind of dance, a lackluster attempt would have been nothing short of sacrilege.  But I'm finally starting to feel "it" again, whatever "it" is, so dancing's back on the menu.  The good news is that it's like riding a bike...your body doesn't forget how to do the moves.  The bad news is that those long-neglected muscles aren't very forgiving.  So...ouch.  But ouch in a good kind of way. :)

06:29 pm: In case anyone was wondering if I'd disappeared off the face of the planet, I've been around, just been really busy and pretty boring, so the few times I've had time to write, I've had nothing really to report.  However, as parents and people familiar with small children know, you never know when your kid is going to up and make you laugh.  Princess did so yesterday.

As she was opening the door to get out of the car and go to school, I said, "Don't forget your backpack!"
"Oh, I wouldn't forget my backpack, mom!" said she.
"Oh, I don't know, you're a pretty forgetful kid," I replied doubtfully (if affectionately).
And she so cheerfully replied, without a single trace of sarcasm, "Well, you're a really remind-ful adult, so it all works out!"

I laughed the whole way home.

01:12 pm: The little things
I'm sure that most people have heard it said that "It's the little things that make life worth living."  Well, it's true, but it's so much more than that.  I know that I for one have seen multiple emails that tell us of all the things for which we should be grateful, but most of those emails only list the terrible things in the world that don't commonly happen here.  Something along the lines of "If you woke up this morning, you are more fortunate than the umpteen thousands who died of disease and starvation during the night."  This is true, and we should be grateful, but it's not very inspiring.  But what if we were thankful, truly thankful, for the little things in life?  How do you think the world would change if more of us took the time to be grateful for things like:

A pat on the face from a child
A load of laundry already folded
A brief kiss on the top of the head just as you're drifting off to sleep
A flowering weed, lovingly picked and placed in your favorite wine glass with a hand-scrawled note reading "I love you mom!"
A full tank of gas when you know that it was empty the last time you drove the car
A note from your boss saying, "We appreciate the job you do!"
A good chat over a cup of coffee
A gentle hand on the small of your back while you settle the bill
A murmured term of endearment
Butterfly kisses
Tickle fights
Long phone conversations
Holding hands
Foot rubs
A quick love note on your favorite color paper
An email from a friend just to say, "Hi!"

These are not the kinds of things that usually gather a lot of notice.  At the most, they make us feel good for the few seconds that we notice them...IF we notice them.  But when you think about it, it's more than that.  It's someone specifically taking time out of their day and spending it on you.  My quote from before about trading a day of your life for what you do with it couldn't be more true.  In that light, someone traded a small portion of their life because they thought YOU were worthwhile.  And these are just the little things.  Kinda makes you smile, doesn't it?  I know I did.  And I'm grateful all over again, smiling over the many smiles I have been blessed with because of the people that thought enough of me to bless me so.

12:14 am: 'Someday'...revisited.
So I had this conversation with my ex many years ago.  Actually, we had this conversation several times over several years, but it always ended with the same word...

Me, in varying degrees of desperation: "When are we going to be together again??"
Ex, in varying degrees of dismissal: "Someday." (or "soon", which meant the same thing.)

Considering the sheer number of times this conversation occurred, plus the fact that the aforementioned reunion never took place, it's not hard to figure out from whence my attitude towards the term "someday" comes.  In my mind, it's not just a cop-out.  It's the ultimate in pussiness.  It's what you tell someone when you are too afraid to actually tell them no, but when no is what you really mean.  It's also the ultimate in cruelty, by keeping someone's hope alive falsely out of pure cowardice. In short, it's a really shitty thing to say.

SO...

I had this conversation with STBF the other day.  We'd never had this conversation before, but that was largely because I'd never been able to work up the courage to bring it up until then.

Me, in what is becoming a growing amount of desperation/frustration: "Are we EVER going to get married??"
STBF, in a tone I can only describe as the "Oh God please let her drop this NOW" tone: "Someday."

Ouch.

02:26 pm: Even more on alcohol
LOL What IS it about drunk people that make them assume that you want to hear from them??

My brother called me last night (several times, in fact) from a concert, and it was obvious that he was WELL in his cups.  I could tell that the concert was that of Charlie Robison, who he knows I can't stand.  I could also tell that the song that was playing at the moment of the first call was "My Home Town," which he knows I detest most of all his songs.  My brother just does stuff like that.  I generally find it hilarious, even when he does call me from concerts of people I can't stand. lol  Occasionally he'll call me from a club or a bar when a song he knows I like to dance to is playing.  Or from his girlfriend's house in the middle of a tickling match.  My brother and I have a good relationship (now).  It's interesting, and weird at times, and occasionally downright confusing for everyone else (our parents included!), but it works pretty well for us.  Even when he does call me drunk in the wee hours of the morning. :-)

12:12 am: A little on alcohol, a lot on work.
So this past weekend, I had one of those, "OMG, I'll NEVER do that again!" experiences. I've said as much to several people. Usually what I get in reply is either, "Yeah, until next time!" or "Yeah, I've heard/said THAT before!" But no, really...I won't! Puking my guts out for 15-16 hours aside, I really don't care for the feeling that comes with hearing about things you've done...of which you either have no recollection, or have just enough to know that they probably aren't kidding. I've never been that plowed before, ever. So while I very well may get sloshed again sometime, it won't be like that! (And it won't be soon, either...I'm about done with alcohol for awhile!) I must admit, though, most of what I do remember was pretty fun.

In stark contrast, this weekend looks to be incredibly boring and quiet. I'm pretty much OK with boring and quiet. I AM a bit lonesome, as STBF has gone to another event this weekend. But it does give me a chance to get some things done around here, as well as to recover from last weekend, and this week. Princess started school this week, and trying to juggle her school and both of our work schedules has left me with a significant amount of lead in my ass. I haven't gotten nearly enough sleep, and trying to get everything organized has been more stressful than I anticipated, so a boring weekend doesn't hurt my feelings at all. With any luck, it'll be a boring, SLEEPY weekend. The good news is, I think I've found a babysitter for the one night that we both work late, so that's one thing off my mind. Once I get the house clean (and all our garb washed and the tent aired out and the living room reorganized and and and...) then I'll be even more at ease. (ha.)

If all you want is a light read, stop here.

12:47 pm: I've had it.
It occurred to me today that I make an awful lot of effort in my life. It also occurred to me that an awful lot of said effort, if not an outright waste, is definitely not yielding much in the way of gratification on my part, at least not any more...if it ever did. I realized that this frustration on my part is causing me to take it out on the people that least deserve it. Therefore, change must occur.

So...

-If you are someone that ONLY calls me when you need something, don't waste my time. I have little enough of it.
-If you are someone that NEVER calls me, and only talks to me if I call or message YOU, don't expect any more phone calls or messages.
-If you are someone who feels the right to treat me with little to no respect, don't expect any yourself. I KNOW the value of my friendship, even if you don't.
-If you are someone who thinks that I have unlimited resources, both personal and financial, and that you have some sort of right to that, think again.
-If you are someone that can't take the time to share in my joys or sorrows, don't expect me to be understanding about it, or to share in yours.
-If you are someone who thinks they can occasionally tell me how "great" I am and then ignore me the rest of the time, don't think I'm fooled by your flattery.
-If you are someone that thinks that any of the above actions is acceptable in a friendship, then you seriously need to examine your definition of the term.

I've said before that I would go to the ends of the earth for anyone I called a friend. That hasn't changed. What is changing is my definition of "friend". Needless to say, people that fit the above descriptions do not meet "friend" criteria, and I will no longer go to the ends of the earth for them, or anywhere else for that matter. I'm tired of wasting my time on people that aren't willing to spend any time on me. So if you are one of those people, you have two choices. Either actually BE a friend, or have a nice life. I can't be bothered with deadbeats.

If you aren't one of those people, give me a call...we'll do lunch.

11:06 pm: So excited!
YAY!! I'm so excited! My friend is moving here!

It all started a week or so ago when my friend S. told me that she had a job interview here. This is a friend that I'd had back home, and she had since moved to first Virginia, then New York. I was really sad to see her go, so to hear that not only was she coming back to Texas, but that she might be coming to MY TOWN was cause for great excitement on my part.

Well, she came down and did interviews here and in another town, and had been waiting to hear back. She was at first nervous because they'd told her they would decide on Monday, and it was Tuesday and she hadn't heard anything. So she called today (Wednesday) to find out what was going on, and the lady she talked to told her that the position had already been offered to someone. So she was kinda bummed out...until the office she would be working for called her back and told her that she was who they were offering the job to! Apparently the first lady she had talked to hadn't known they were one and the same.

So now I have a friend, a friend from my life before, moving here! I am totally stoked. Maybe this will get me out of the house a little more. :-)

In other news, I finally got Princess enrolled in the private school I'd wanted to put her in. I had almost decided that I just couldn't do it, but both my dad and STBF talked me into doing it anyway. Now that I have met her teacher, and talked with some other parents from the school, I'm feeling pretty good about it. I think this will be a good thing for all of us. She won't start until after Labor Day, however, which is OK...but girlfriend needs to go to SCHOOL! And find some FRIENDS! Because she has become WAY too dependent on me for ALL of her interactions! I can't say that I mind overly much, as I have enjoyed the heck out of her since she's been here with me again, but she does need some friends her age, and some friends that are not her mom! She does know one or two kids in this area...but they are not in this town, and getting them together can be a bit of an ordeal. I'll be glad when she has some friends she can hang out with here, that doesn't take an entire day out of my time, every time. Should be exciting.